A Sunk Cost
by Young Goodman Brown
Summary: Crushes are troublesome. Shikamaru learns why—the hard way. ShikaTen.
1. because he's been eyeing her from afar

_A/N: Why isn't there a genre called "Learning lessons" or "Enlightening revelations garnered only through painful but necessary growing experiences"?_

_Anyways, if there existed a category for either of those, that would be the heading this fic would be filed under. Ah, well. Multi-chapter ShikaTen, ahoy!_

_Alternate Summary: A woman doesn't need to be aggressive, dominating, or bossy to be endlessly troublesome. ShikaTen._

_Disclaimer: Yeah, no._

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**ch. i**

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"Oi, lazy-ass! Guess who's in town?"

Shikamaru grimaced as the voice of a certain dog-nin pierced through the tranquil summer air, interrupting his hitherto pleasant and engaging chess match with Aburame Shino. All he wanted was a quiet afternoon, spent lounging around his house and playing the occasional game of chess or shogi, free of annoyances and nuisances and generally troublesome things. He didn't want to talk to Kiba, clearly an annoyance, and he most _definitely_ did not want to discuss the new arrival in town, even _more _clearly the harbinger of the most annoying things he could possibly encounter, _ever_.

Kiba frowned as he was pointedly ignored by both his teammate and the shadow nin. _Damn bastards. _He chanced a glance at Chouji, who was seated beside Shikamaru, and donned a pitifully forlorn expression. "Come on, _guys_…"

Chouji rolled his eyes as he extracted a potato chip from an enormous plastic bag. "Yes, Kiba, we heard. Temari's here on a diplomatic mission, right?"

That was all the encouragement Kiba needed. "Right! _Temari's_ here," he said slyly, all traces of his puppy-dog face gone. He bounded up to Shikamaru's side, slinging a wholly unwelcome arm around the exasperated nin's shoulder. "You know what _that _means, right? Did you meet up with her yet? What'd Ino say? Did she freak? Did they catfight it out? Mmmm…because I'd love to see those sexy, blon—_ouch_!"

A knight rebounded off of Kiba's head and thudded across the floor. "For god's sake, Inuzuka," Shikamaru growled as he lowered his hand, glaring unrelentingly as Kiba whimpered in self-pity. Even Akamaru looked a bit disgruntled at his master's lack of tact. "It's a nice day, and I don't want to hear a damn thing about either of those troublesome women. Stop it already."

Kiba rubbed his head. "Since when are you so damn touchy?" he muttered irritably. "I was just wondering. Don't know what either of those chicks see in you."

Shikamaru sighed. He didn't know either, and truthfully he didn't care. Although he did admit to himself that Ino and Temari were both strong, confident, _beautiful_ kunoichi, and certainly attractive by anyone's standards, their methods of flirting were unusually…_aggressive. _He didn't find it flattering, or amusing, or the least bit enjoyable—their competition for his affection could only be described as _troublesome_, not to mention loud and sometimes downright _painful._

He rubbed his shoulders at the memory of the literal tug-of-war his poor arms had been subjected to mere hours before. _Damn, I guess love really does hurt. _Well, at least it did for him. The whole situation was too exasperating for words—especially since people like Kiba found it necessary to tease him about his unexpected and wholly unwanted popularity at any given opportunity. _Don't forget underserved too, genius._ And frankly, he suspected that Ino and Temari were only in it to annoy the hell out of each other…not because they actually wanted his affection.

Shikamaru fiddled a rook between his thumb and forefinger. What kind of prize was he, anyway? He wasn't worth the spectacular catfight that broke out only that morning, drawing an enormous audience of onlookers eager to watch two kunoichi duke it out right there in the middle of the village square.

It didn't help that he'd spotted her_—that cute chuunin he'd been discreetly eyeing from Gai's team, what was her name again?_—giggling at his misery from afar.

"I did not realize, Kiba," Shino murmured, in what could only be described as smug amusement, "that you are actually a gossip girl in disguise. Why? Because normally you are too much of a brute to even form complete sentences."

Chouji gagged, choking at Shino's attempt at humor. Coughing to clear the crumbs from his throat, Chouji looked disbelievingly at the bug nin before cautiously scooting closer to his friend. "Hey, Shikamaru," he murmured, crinkling his potato chips nervously, "…are you actually into one of those girls? You seem really antsy."

"_Tch_," he bit out, both at Chouji's comment and at the cheery visage that appeared unbidden in his mind's eye. _Stupid doe eyes, stupid grace, stupid china doll form. _"…I don't want to choose either of them."

"What, you want both?" Kiba exclaimed, waggling his eyebrows suggestively as he ignored the '_hell no!' _that erupted from the shadow nin. "Awww, come on, Nara. If you're looking for a hot, blonde kunoichi with ridiculous attitude problems, you're not going to do much better than those two!" He grinned, reveling in the way Shikamaru slammed down a pawn. "Now, now, lazy-ass. Don't get so riled up. Just tell us which blonde you're after!"

Shikamaru snorted disdainfully. "Like hell I will. She's not even blonde."

A sudden silence washed over the three men. Shikamaru resisted the urge to smack his forehead. _Shit. Way to go, genius._ "Wait a minute," Shino ventured carefully, "…There actually _is_ a girl?"

Shikamaru turned away from his opponent, embarrassed beyond words. "Troublesome…"

"Holy shit!" Kiba bellowed, clawing at his jacket in excitement. "Are you serious? No fucking way! Who is it, who is it?"

"He's not going to tell us, idiot," Chouji muttered rudely, though he was just as shocked at the revelation. "Even _I_ didn't know he was interested in somebody..."

"Okay, okay…no need to be bitter about it or anything," Kiba muttered, scratching his head as he turned back to the shadow nin. "But come on, Nara. You could at least tell us what she's like, if you're not going to give a _name_…"

Well, it's not like he knew what it was anyway. Shikamaru mulled over his options—what could he say without saying anything at all? (_Yeah, I don't really know that much about her myself, I just know that I stare at her all the time like a fucking creep…and that sometimes I indulge, sometimes I imagine we're in love, and sometimes I have to shake myself and remember that women aren't worth the troublesome, troublesome risks._) "…She has dark hair."

They all pondered that for a moment. "That is a completely useless piece of information," Shino finally said. "Why? Because that describes…approximately 80 percent of the Konohan population."

Shikamaru rolled his eyes. "Exactly." He watched Shino absently as the bug nin slid a knight across the chessboard. "…And since it's too troublesome to figure out which chick it is, you should stop asking me."

"You're no fun," Kiba pouted, crossing his arms immaturely. He then narrowed his eyes. "But why, exactly, does it bother you so much? You're never _this _much of an ass. What's the deal with her, anyway?"

Shikamaru shrugged as he twiddled a bishop between his fingertips. _Wish I knew. _"It doesn't really matter," he drawled, before slapping the chess piece down with quite a bit more force than necessary. "She hardly knows I exist."

Everyone jolted as Shino abruptly jerked upward, nearly knocking over the chessboard in the process. Three pairs of eyes stared in utter bewilderment as the Aburame positively _twitched_, eyebrows furrowed and mouth agape in a wholly uncharacteristic manner.

Kiba was the first to react. "Oi, Buggie. What the hell…?"

Shino unsteadily returned to his sitting position. With a slow, deliberate hand, he slid his queen forward, all the while staring at Shikamaru incredulously. "…Checkmate."

Shino stared, Kiba shrugged, Chouji smiled, and Shikamaru just about died right there on his own front porch.

_Aw, dammit. _There it was—all the proof a genius could need, laid out for him neatly on the squares of a chessboard. That damn woman would undo him, truly, if she could unsettle him so after only two conversations and four point five interactions, if the mere _thought_ of her could apparently distract him to the point of actually losing a chess match for the first time in eight years, to _Shino _no less…

It wasn't even fair. Vaguely, he remembered that she was a long-distance fighter, a kunoichi capable of disarming and dismantling a target from miles away without the victim's knowledge or consent. And he sure as hell _didn't_ consent, not in the slightest. He had no reason to like her at all; they had scarcely interacted, she was completely unremarkable, he was hardly a romantic. How could she possibly…?

Shikamaru _tch_ed. He seriously needed to end this little infatuation, _now_, because from the looks of things thus far, the projected outcome didn't bode well for him. After all, she barely noticed him; he sort of obsessed over her endlessly.

Sighing once more, he turned his head to the clouds.

_Face it, genius. You're well and truly screwed._

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_A/N: Another multi-chapter fic! I swear that I AM working on The Second Absolution, really, so please bear with me—that story is a monster, and I want to make sure that I proceed cautiously. In the meantime, I hope you enjoy this fic ^_^_

_Though I enjoy both Shika x Temari and Shika x Ino, I think that Shika x Tenten needs more love…so this is my humble offering to the fanon! Plus, I'm excited to examine Shikamaru's character through the use of an uncommon Shika pairing and relationship dynamic. Stick with me—it'll be good ;)_

_Review, please? :D_


	2. because losing is okay, sometimes

_A/N: My Valentine's Day gift for anyone who is going to spend the holiday admiring someone from afar…myself included :)Here's to the awkward, confusing, utterly wonderful springtime of youth ^_^d_

_Alternate Summary: A woman doesn't need to be aggressive, dominating, or bossy to be endlessly troublesome. ShikaTen._

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ch. ii

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Shikamaru sighed, staring up at the expanse of the sky as he ambled toward the Konoha Armory. It had been nearly two months since that fateful afternoon, when he'd lost a chess match against Shino and the battle against his own self-awareness…and when he had begrudgingly accepted defeat. He'd fought it like hell, of course—he wouldn't lose to a goddamn _woman _if he could help it—but after much denial, contemplation, and copious amounts of private grumbling, he'd finally admitted the truth…at least to himself.

He had a crush on her.

The lazy nin scowled. _Okay, now that just sounds fucking ridiculous_. What he meant was that he had an unusual but exceptionally _mild_ interest in the older kunoichi, one that was maybe a little romantic but probably mostly hormonal. _Oh really, genius? _Because crushes were for—were for kids. And for people who actually wanted to put up with the bullshit of a relationship.

But he _was _interested in her, so he decided it probably wasn't wise to fight it. It was likely better to indulge himself at least a little, rather than suppress the feeling and let it fester until it inevitably exploded in an unexpected outburst of frustration and sexual aggression—so really, by putting up with the troublesome effort of accepting and surrendering to his feelings, he was just preventing an even _more _troublesome situation in the future. That was the only reason, of course. Really. And to that effect, he furtively looked up her file—Tenten was her name, strange, but kind of nice—and actually walked _into_ the Konoha Armory on a regular basis these days, as opposed to staring awkwardly at the imposing stone building from afar in hopes of maybe spotting the bun-haired kunoichi as he had previously been wont to do.

…She went there every Monday, Thursday, and Saturday, from 2 to 3:30 p.m., always started from the left side of the store and worked her way to the right, purchased about 400 ryo of weapons every time (except on Saturdays, when she splurged and spent approximately 750 ryo on larger and more extravagant items), bought weapons polish and whetstones every other Thursday, typically chatted with the storeowner for about ten minutes or so while thumbing through a copy of the _Konoha in Arms _magazine, and always arranged for the weapons to be delivered to her apartment instead of carrying them out herself.

Not like he really noticed or anything.

…Okay, so what if he did? He was a ninja, dammit! He was _paid _to pay attention to details and to commit them to memory—that was his specialty, after all, why he was known for being the most brilliant of all up-and-coming strategists in Fire Country! Because he noticed _everything!_And besides, he had a good reason for going to the Armory. Sure, maybe not three times a week…or even once a month…but every ninja needed weapons, him included. It would only make sense for him to stop by every so often. Or, like, all the time.

And what was else he supposed to do? Follow her to her apartment, to her team training grounds, to her private spars with that Hyuuga teammate of hers? All of that was too obvious and stalkerish, not to mention a massive amount of effort for what was only a cru—er, a mild and _almost entirely platonic _interest in a fellow shinobi.

Shikamaru frowned as he wrenched open the door to the Armory. Thinking about all of this was just too bothersome. That was why he was here now, on a Wednesday, instead of what he'd secretly dubbed as 'Tenten Time', because he knew she wouldn't be there and because he actually needed to purchase weapons for once. He didn't need the distraction of covertly observing and obsessing over her from the shadows of the store.

All of this _sucked_. Why was he doing this to himself? The whole exercise was pointless; it wasn't like he really got anything out of it at all. It just made him feel stupid, because he of all people never lifted a finger if he could help it, never exerted effort if there was no purpose or reward at all.

A tinkling noise resounded through the store, one he resolutely ignored as he stared unseeingly at a shelf full of kunai and shuriken. _Focus, genius._Resolving to concentrate on the task at hand, he hefted the weight of two kunai within his palms, trying to decide which one to buy. And then he was suddenly struck by a memory of Tenten gleefully spinning a shuriken around her fine-boned fingers, which led to thinking of Tenten in general, which led to images of Tenten dancing and smiling and laughing and—_gah_, see, now he couldn't even _look_ at a weapon without thinking of her, which was absolutely ridiculous considering how he was a _fucking ninja!_

He groaned as he set the kunai down. The more he thought about it, the more he was convinced that the entirety of romance was a wholly useless endeavor…since it was seriously making him lose his damn mind. It would surely explain the behavior of certified morons like Naruto and Lee, and Ino and Sakura too…even Hinata seemed possessed of questionable sanity, considering how she obsessively stalked the oblivious Uzumaki brat…

And then the aura of her chakra washed over him, and the melody of her voice combined with the tinkle of a windchime tore through him, and he was suddenly very aware of the vision of white and crimson that flitted through the open doorway…and he realized that he had unofficially joined the ranks of the idiots.

_Shit._

He hated this feeling, the way his usually brilliant mind utterly refused to comply with him, utterly refused to concentrate on anything _but_ _her_. And of course, now he couldn't just pick a damn kunai and bail. No, now he had to stand awkwardly nearby while she floated down the aisles, while he watched her make her way to the inner recesses of the armory.

No, now he had to engage once more in the eternal debate: approach, or stalk?

Shikamaru ignored the bewildered looks of the storeowner as he proceeded to buckle down and get into his thinking pose. Because this seriously required some heavy-duty contemplation. _You came here today, genius, because you didn't want to see her, because you didn't want to think about her. But you thought about her, anyways, and you saw her, anyways._ Wait, that didn't have an actual conclusion! Shit! _Yeah, it did—you're officially a moron now, genius._

"Erm," the voice of the storeowner broke Shikamaru from his internal argument with himself, and he grudgingly looked up. The man looked distinctly…nervous? "…Nara-san, she'll probably be by…by the morning stars. In Aisle 8. Just in case you were, you know…wondering…?"

"…Oh," Shikamaru answered, not a little dumbly, as he slowly stood up. "Uh, thanks?"

Well, looked like the decision was made for him? Which cut him the effort of making the choice himself. Okay, that was pretty sweet, actually. Shikamaru almost thanked the storeowner as he started walking away, before he remembered that _oh shit now he had to TALK to her!_

And what would he even say when he saw her? This wasn't…this wasn't good. He needed a contingency plan of some sort. Because seriously, what if she asked him why he was even there? Why he knew she would be in the back? Why even the storeowner could tell that he only came to the Armory, 23 times out of 24, to creep around and watch her? How would he even capture her interest?

Shikamaru found himself getting worked up as he slowly made his way toward the back aisles of the store, which was sort of a problem because he never fucking _got_ worked up. He felt his eyebrow twitching as he tried to make himself calm down.

_Okay genius, relax. You're only here because…because Asuma-sensei sent you to pick up some cigs. Wait, wrong store. Because Asuma-sensei sent you to compare and contrast the quality of…of chakra blades in the inventory of the Konoha Armory. That's good, that's good. A great game plan, actually—Asuma's been looking for a replacement, anyway, and you can even ask her questions about the weapons, on how to use them, on what qualities to look for. Wait, does she even use chakra blades? _Shikamaru almost punched himself in an attempt to still his ever-racing thoughts. _Don't overthink, genius. Only a mild interest, remember? So be casual. Girls like…caaaasual._

And with that in mind, Shikamaru casually ambled over to Aisle 8, casually smoothed down the wrinkles of his shinobi-issued cargo pants, casually stuffed his hands into the pockets of his Chuunin vest, and casually approached the oblivious kunoichi. He casually watched as she held up two maces in her hands, casually appreciated the delicate lines of her slender fingers, and casually ran his eyes over her thoughtful posture, over the copper of her hair and the lithe muscles of her dancer's form. He then proceeded to not so casually jostle against a metal rack filled with an unsettling number of sickles and chains and knock the whole damn thing down.

_Shit, genius!_And of course his first impression had to be this embarrassing fumble, and of course the loud _clang!_had to startle her from her weapons-inspired reverie so that she could properly notice the idiot who just fell on his ass! _Redeem yourself, genius, redeem yourself!_

An awkward silence, in which Shikamaru frantically looked over himself and Tenten frantically looked over the weapons.

"Erm," he tried, then cleared his throat. _Real smooth, genius. Try again._"Um…tch. Damn troublesome racks, eh, Tenten?"

He waited on tenterhooks as she lovingly rearranged the last of the sickles, cooing something that sounded an awful lot like _'awww, there there, you poor things, mama's here'_ before finally turning to him. He flinched, shutting his eyes reflexively—_here it is, here's your first legitimate conversation, here's the reason you should've run away when you had the chance—!_"Hey, you should be more careful, you know! The silver ornamentation of those scabbards is super delicate, and the lacquer detail chips pretty easily!"

Shikamaru slowly opened a cautious sloe-black eye, watching as Tenten scowled and put her hands on her hips. The scolding tone of her voice was belied by the cheerful curve of her lips, though, and he nearly sighed in relief as she continued to ramble. _Thank Kami the first move is always a feint._"Ah, well, at least none of the weapons were damaged in the end! Oh, right—what about you? Are you okay, Shikamaru-san?"

Okay, this wasn't going quite as badly as he feared it would. So he shrugged. "Yeah, I'm—" And then did a double-take, choking back the casual introduction he was just about to offer her. "Wait—you remember me?"

She looked surprised at that. "…Well yeah, of course! You know, that Chuunin Exam a few years back?" He, observed, warily, as her amber eyes suddenly glinted with…mischief? "And of course I know _you—_I will _always_ remember the way you completely kicked Temari's ass! That was totally awesome, ha!"

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow in confusion, deciding to just nod along with whatever it was she was saying. _I didn't exactly 'kick her ass', though…so how was I_ _even worth remembering, anyways? Does Tenten have a grudge against that Sand girl or something?_ "Uh, thanks?" _Hmm, need to look into that later…_

"But yeah! Then you led that Sasuke mission with Neji and some of the others," she bit her lip adorably in concentration, something that he tried not to focus on _too _much, "…And I guess you've been on a lot of other important missions too, right? You're pretty well-known around these parts." She tilted her head, curiosity sparking in her doe-like eyes. "You knew _my_ name, didn't you? Why wouldn't I remember you?"

Shikamaru tried to ignore the warm feeling that unexpectedly bloomed in his chest by awkwardly scratching the back of his neck. He seriously must be losing it, because suddenly all of the personal humiliation he'd suffered for his stalkerish tendencies seemed to wash away, seemed completely _worth it_, now that he saw the pleased smile that graced her lips. _Whoops, better not tell her the truth._"I suppose. Yeah."

A pause.

_No, genius! Prolong the damn…say something, anything!_"Um. Though I'm not sure I really like…the visibility, you know? Yeah, it's…troublesome…"

She cocked her head, her attention thankfully gripped by his not so brilliant conversation starter. "Really, Shikamaru-san?" And then he watched, mildly perturbed, as Tenten positively _grinned—_while absently picking up a morning star and twirling it in her hands. "Mou, better to have at least _some _kind of reputation than none at all! And besides, you're only popular because everyone has good things to say!" She beamed at him, wildly brandishing the weapon in her enthusiasm as she offered him a cheerful thumbs up. "It just means that the people of this Village really value you!"

God, she was cute. Even though he nearly lost a limb right there. "Yeah…I guess…"

"It's true! OH!" He almost jumped at her sudden shout. _Damn, this girl has too much energy!_ "Shikamaru-san! I was going to ask—what are you doing in this back area of the Konoha Armory? Most people don't venture this far into the store, you know!"

Shikamaru blanked for a second. "Oh…I, uh…" Shit! What was the contingency plan again? "Well, you see, I…er…chakra blades…?"

Her eyes widened. "WHAT! No way!" Tenten bounded up to him, her face all up in his own, that beaming smile much too close for comfort. Shikamaru gulped. "You're here for chakra blades?" He nodded, bewildered, not sure what else to do. She grasped at his shoulders as her voice lowered to a conspiratorial whisper. "Really? Because I was just—Shikamaru-san, could it be that you, too, are here to check out the top-secret shipment of chakra blades that Storeowner-san just smuggled in this morning from Bird Country? Titanium-alloy, triple-bladed, leather-gripped weapons, forged in the hidden iron hearths of the Northern Mountains, designed to channel 418% more chakra than the standard blade and perfectly suited for high-altitude combat?" Her face shone with starry-eyed excitement as she shook him gleefully. "Is that why you're here? Is it? Is it?"

_Uh…_"Uh…"

"I knew it!" She cried out triumphantly as she suddenly clutched his arm. Tightly_._Very tightly. _Tch. Remember, genius, love hurts._"Come on, let's go check it out! I've always wanted a chakra blade, because I've never used one before! Which isn't right, because I'm a weapons mistress, and because I'm always working hard to add to my arsenal! What about you, Shikamaru-san? Do you have a chakra blade? Do you? Do you? I'm so glad you came today! Who would've thought we had so much in common?"

He groaned halfheartedly as she dragged him into a back room of the Armory, merrily laughing and chattering away…though he couldn't say that he was really complaining. He was used to being pushed around by women, anyways, and this one was actually…_nice_.

Shikamaru furrowed his brow in thought as he tried to ignore the herculean grip on his forearm. He really _was_ a moron— all he had to do was pick a stupid kunai and get the hell out, but _no,_he just _had _to stick around, and he just _had _to listen to the suggestions of a well-meaning but meddlesome stranger. Now he was going to spend the entire afternoon studying a topic he was only marginally interested in…and exerting a troublesome amount of effort trying to impress the damn girl. And for what gain?

_Remember, genius: surrender a little, and you won't lose yourself completely._Oh yeah, maybe that. And maybe the whole 'crush slash mild interest' thing did make him feel like he was losing his damn mind, but…maybe that was okay, too. He, of all people, could stand to be an idiot every once in a while. It was easier than just running away and trying to avoid the troublesome situation, in any case.

And besides, it was sometimes okay to make stupid gambles, as long as he didn't lose himself too much. Those occasionally had the biggest payoffs, anyways. Right?

…_Right._

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_A/N: I've decided to make this entire fic Shikamaru-centric, so prepare for some delicious ventures into the mind of our favorite shadow-nin. Mhmmm, oh yezz. :D Let me know how my characterization (of everyone!) is going…just for the record, Tenten's down-to-earth, enthusiastic, cutesy personality is taken from the anime :3 I sort of love it, especially since it's a fascinating counterpoint to Shika's~_

_So, in short: the tone of this story has changed, though my goals haven't. Shikamaru's inner monologues are inspired by my own experiences with awkward crushes and conversations with my younger brothers…I'm sure these feelings are fairly universal :)_

_Review, please? :D_


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